Before I get too far along, I wanted to post a dedication.
To my sister - I know siblings are supposed to love and look out for each other, but what is "supposed" to be does not always occur. I knew my sister loved me; however, I don't think I really knew her love and compassion (beyond what is supposed to be) for me, until I went through my health crisis.
My sister, the great researcher! She explored the Internet and talked to her friends regarding a doctor that could help me. She looked for what other options I had to having surgery. Believe it or not, it seems many of the doctors that I consulted didn't seem sure that they could get ALL the endo or either told me I would have to have a hysterectomy. My sister was the one who came across the doctor who ultimately performed my last surgery for the endo.
Sis unselfishly departed from her own family and traveled with me to Oregon to have the surgery. That experience in and of itself was very surreal. (I'll speak on this more in a later post) Since that time, I've watched her and noticed how she extends that giving and compassionate spirit towards her family and those she comes into contact with and all of this makes me smile and feel blessed. Thank you.
I dedicate this post to my parents, who have always been there. They saw the tears and heard the screams. I can't imagine what it must have been like for them to see me going through that debilitating type of pain. After I had the surgery, they took care of me for the weeks of recovery that followed. My Mom said to me, "You'll always be our child no matter what your age." They've always done what they had to do to make sure I was okay. They are all of the things that parents should be and more than I could ever hope for. Thank you.
I dedicate this post to my friends. I had friends who left work with me when I was in excruciating pain and took the train with me home to make sure I got there okay; friends who stayed with me over the weekend in case I needed to get to the emergency room; friends who prayed with me over the phone; friends who took me to doctor's appointments, friends who called me to check in on me, and friends who did whatever I just might happen to have needed. I think when you don't have your immediate family close by, friends step into that "gap" and become not "like" family, but family. Grateful. Thank you.
Last but certainly not least, I want to thank some of the doctors and medical staff I've come in contact with. I thank my gyn for not recommending and giving in to my initial desire to have a hysterectomy. I thank the wonderful and kind emergency room doctors, nurses and staff for their compassionate care. I thank the doctor who had the courage to state that she didn't know or didn't have enough experience and didn't let ego get in the way of me getting the treatment I needed. Lastly, I thank the doctor who performed my surgery and has focused his practice soley on the treatment of endometriosis.
I have stated before that when we are going through something that seems unbearable, we are somehow extended a portion of grace that helps us get through that tough time. I experienced this "portion of grace," God's grace, through these relationships and knowing that I was never alone in my struggle.
Thank you and much love!
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Saturday, February 25, 2012
Let's start "my story" here (Entry #1)
Entry taken from previous document of my experiences
May 2003, I went on vacation with my parents and their seniors group to Canada. That’s my first recollection of its start. I couldn’t even go out with the group on the boat tour on the St. Lawrence River. I felt too bad. We were supposed to leave on the bus the next day headed back to their home and my parents and I thought, “ How in the world am I going to make it back on this bus?” My dad even asked me about going to an urgent care. I said “Here in Canada Dad? Where are we going to find one?”
My back, behind and rectal area were killing me. I couldn’t have a bowel movement, I couldn’t urinate, and on top of all that … my period was on. It was awful. After trying numerous things, I finally found some relief by sitting in a tub of hot water. I could finally urinate. Yep, that’s right, I urinated right there in the bath water and sat right there in it as I continued to get some relief. After that, I was finally able to get to sleep.
My parents and I agreed that I could not go through another period like this. When I got back to my home in the Washington DC area, I contacted my gynecologist. I had my women’s wellness exam (pap smear and breast exam) and told her of my problem. I had gotten off my birth control pills November/December 2002 (I started taking them around 1985 to control the irregularity and heavy bleeding) and thought that maybe I was suffering from some type of withdrawal symptoms.
The following months did not seem as bad as May had been for me. But it seems like late summer or early fall, my symptoms kicked back up. My gynecologist referred me to doctors in the areas of urology and gastroenterology (GI). She said that even though I have fibroids, the fibroids could not be causing me the pain I’d been describing because they were too small. I wanted to have a hysterectomy, but …no one else wanted me to have one. So I didn't.
I'll tell you about my visits with the GI and urologist, but that's for another post.
May 2003, I went on vacation with my parents and their seniors group to Canada. That’s my first recollection of its start. I couldn’t even go out with the group on the boat tour on the St. Lawrence River. I felt too bad. We were supposed to leave on the bus the next day headed back to their home and my parents and I thought, “ How in the world am I going to make it back on this bus?” My dad even asked me about going to an urgent care. I said “Here in Canada Dad? Where are we going to find one?”
My back, behind and rectal area were killing me. I couldn’t have a bowel movement, I couldn’t urinate, and on top of all that … my period was on. It was awful. After trying numerous things, I finally found some relief by sitting in a tub of hot water. I could finally urinate. Yep, that’s right, I urinated right there in the bath water and sat right there in it as I continued to get some relief. After that, I was finally able to get to sleep.
My parents and I agreed that I could not go through another period like this. When I got back to my home in the Washington DC area, I contacted my gynecologist. I had my women’s wellness exam (pap smear and breast exam) and told her of my problem. I had gotten off my birth control pills November/December 2002 (I started taking them around 1985 to control the irregularity and heavy bleeding) and thought that maybe I was suffering from some type of withdrawal symptoms.
The following months did not seem as bad as May had been for me. But it seems like late summer or early fall, my symptoms kicked back up. My gynecologist referred me to doctors in the areas of urology and gastroenterology (GI). She said that even though I have fibroids, the fibroids could not be causing me the pain I’d been describing because they were too small. I wanted to have a hysterectomy, but …no one else wanted me to have one. So I didn't.
I'll tell you about my visits with the GI and urologist, but that's for another post.
Lions and Tigers and Bears
Lions and tigers and bears! - sounds pretty scary doesn’t it?
But the tripping part is that yeah, we all have our hormones, however, a person can have endometriosis (endo) and fibroids and have no symptoms - no pain.
I like what I read in Christiane Northrop’s book “Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom.” I couldn’t go back and find the specific wording (when I do I’ll share it with you in its exact words) but, basically she stated that we may be predisposed for fibroids or endometriosis or other conditions based on factors in our environment, genes, etc.; however, our thoughts and emotions are one of the triggers to the outward manifestations of our conditions. (more on thoughts and emotions to come)
I like what I read in Christiane Northrop’s book “Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom.” I couldn’t go back and find the specific wording (when I do I’ll share it with you in its exact words) but, basically she stated that we may be predisposed for fibroids or endometriosis or other conditions based on factors in our environment, genes, etc.; however, our thoughts and emotions are one of the triggers to the outward manifestations of our conditions. (more on thoughts and emotions to come)
If you’ve experienced either of the above-mentioned diseases or "dis-eases", then you may know of the pain, anxiety, depression, etc. A life dismal and full of despair....it doesn't have to be! For however much we’ve suffered in the past and may be going through even now - we are going to use what we can have control over:
What we eat
How we move
What we think
Is it just that simple? Please know that there are no guarantees. No, it’s not simple at all, but that doesn’t mean conquering this pain in our lives can not be done. I’m not sharing with you what someone told me or just what I’ve read about - I’m sharing with you what I have seen work for me. What is your story.....I want to hear about your experiences.
Perhaps you had good or uneventful periods, but you know of someone (a sister, relative or friend) who had painful periods and you’d like to share what they went through or they can come here and share.
We’ll also talk about natural remedies. I’ve had my good share of ibuprofen (and much stronger drugs) and was thankful to get it, but I want to turn the page on that and hope to not be in the kind of pain to need it. How? By being more mindful the food, the movement and the thoughts I allow into my daily living (and whatever other natural alternatives I can utilize.)
Do I still struggle with what I eat, consistent exercise and controlling my unproductive thoughts? You better believe it! But, one day at a time and when I fall short of what it is that I want to or would do, I just have at it again. Beating myself up and worrying is not going to do me the good that I want, need and DECIDED that I will have in my life. Did it, done it. done. We’ll be going through these three specific things in more detail in the short and long term, so stay tuned.
Others areas will be covered as we go along as as you may have topics you would like discussed. I look forward to hearing what it is you do or have done to enjoy a better quality of life. Let’s go!
Have you used food, exercise or your thoughts, attitude, or outlook to help alleviate your pain?
I just wanna say
First and foremost I want to thank God.
Second, I can not think of a more fitting day to be writing this. My period is on and while this is not anywhere near being my worst period, it is not the best one either - and I know the reason why.
Someone once said, if people knew better, they would do better. This does not always ring true with me. I admit that I can be stubborn and have selective memory at times.
I love food! I love sugar! Over the Christmas holiday, I acted a fool in terms of my eating and I paid dearly for it when my period came on. So at the beginning of the year, I said I would eliminate meat from my diet, and I have (for the most part). I have had some shrimp this year, once or twice. My January period was much better by comparison and I didn't have to take any ibuprofen. So I'm good now, right? I'm so wrong.
So back to my earlier statement regarding selective memory. I forgot (hmm..) that I had read that eating soy products may be a negative for women with (or have had) endometriosis or estrogen sensitivities. I'm not speaking of all soy because all soy is not created equal. Fermented soy products like tofu, miso and tempeh are supposedly okay and not processed the same as a lot of the soys found all over the grocery stores in soy milks, powders, power bars, cheeses and imitation animal foods.
Did the above just say imitation animal foods? Dang that selective memory! Since I decided to eliminate meat, couldn't I at least have something that was like meat. I had been eating soy nuggets, putting marinade on them and guess what? It tasted just like........chicken! No more soy nuggets for me. I was also eating vegan sausage which probably also had some soy in it. What my eating should look like goes far beyond vegetarianism or veganism - at least they can eat wheat and for the vegetarian, some eggs or dairy if they choose.
For me, it's not about vegetarian or vegan. Also, I am aware of the discussions from animal cruelty to protecting the environment to sustainability to our eating being related to colonialism and slavery - I get some of this and I hope we can share on some of these issues. I just want to be healthy and not experience the pain or discomfort during my periods. This is not a dream and I've experienced the good to great periods before. I know what must be done and this right here is within MY control.
If you would like to share your story and have it posted as a separate page on this blog, contact me by e-mail by clicking on the "Contact me" link on the right of the page. The e-mail address is ihadtoscream@gmail.com.
Second, I can not think of a more fitting day to be writing this. My period is on and while this is not anywhere near being my worst period, it is not the best one either - and I know the reason why.
Someone once said, if people knew better, they would do better. This does not always ring true with me. I admit that I can be stubborn and have selective memory at times.
I love food! I love sugar! Over the Christmas holiday, I acted a fool in terms of my eating and I paid dearly for it when my period came on. So at the beginning of the year, I said I would eliminate meat from my diet, and I have (for the most part). I have had some shrimp this year, once or twice. My January period was much better by comparison and I didn't have to take any ibuprofen. So I'm good now, right? I'm so wrong.
So back to my earlier statement regarding selective memory. I forgot (hmm..) that I had read that eating soy products may be a negative for women with (or have had) endometriosis or estrogen sensitivities. I'm not speaking of all soy because all soy is not created equal. Fermented soy products like tofu, miso and tempeh are supposedly okay and not processed the same as a lot of the soys found all over the grocery stores in soy milks, powders, power bars, cheeses and imitation animal foods.
Did the above just say imitation animal foods? Dang that selective memory! Since I decided to eliminate meat, couldn't I at least have something that was like meat. I had been eating soy nuggets, putting marinade on them and guess what? It tasted just like........chicken! No more soy nuggets for me. I was also eating vegan sausage which probably also had some soy in it. What my eating should look like goes far beyond vegetarianism or veganism - at least they can eat wheat and for the vegetarian, some eggs or dairy if they choose.
For me, it's not about vegetarian or vegan. Also, I am aware of the discussions from animal cruelty to protecting the environment to sustainability to our eating being related to colonialism and slavery - I get some of this and I hope we can share on some of these issues. I just want to be healthy and not experience the pain or discomfort during my periods. This is not a dream and I've experienced the good to great periods before. I know what must be done and this right here is within MY control.
If you would like to share your story and have it posted as a separate page on this blog, contact me by e-mail by clicking on the "Contact me" link on the right of the page. The e-mail address is ihadtoscream@gmail.com.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)